< Scratch Wiki:April Fools

Revision as of 21:38, 10 November 2021 by Wangat (talk | contribs) (we need more news)

Rage icon.png This is an April Fools' Day version of Scratch Wiki Home. Please don't take it seriously. You can find the original here.
Kumquat.jpg Everyone in the entire world hates this article, so it will be eaten by an evil kumquat soon. You cannot use anything to stop the kumquat from eating the page, or the kumquat will eat you.
Admins or cats that are not kumquats: remember to check the page history and what doesn't links here before letting the kumquat eat the page.

Made by Kaj, for a bunch of total 9,223,372,036,854,775,807+1=-9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (cause my calculator is a calculator that only has 64 bits :() random hackers!!1!
2169126123080 articles deleted since 64 Februarchember 9999 when Kaj took over
Scratch News
Octnovdeber 412, 430291 — Scratch Team creates new program to help increase energy units
In response to the banning of Scratch from a parallel universe, the number of users has dropped drastically by 35,712,035 users. The Scratch Team has decided to create a new Scratch program called Kajtober. It was created by kaj WikiMonster, inspired by Scratchtober. The ST hopes that this will enthuse users to create projects about Kaj, which will help to make up the energy units lost from those 35,712,035 users in order to rebuild their machine that mres they blew up.
Marpil 78, 12387 — Scratch banned in a parallel universe
The Scratch Team found out that Scratch became so popular in a parallel universe that almost everyone who was there was using it. The ST has found an obstacle in realizing their evil deeds: one of the people from the parallel universe decided to protest against the ST and declare Scratch illegal. 99.999% of all people in the parallel universe were banned by the Scratch Team in an effort to solve this problem. The ST made the dungeon of banned users bigger to make room for the new prisoners. They also found out that Kaj was responsible for letting people from the other universe know about Scratch, so he was banned too. The Scratch Team also decided to ban Scratch in the Pokémon world (the planet you've perhaps heard about in the anime). Since then, only people on Earth can use Scratch.
Lalaember 67, 5694 — Gobo loses his flower
Gobo lost his favorite flower yesterday. He needs help finding it. He will reward -∞ bobux for finding it.
Aprily 251, 16283 — Kaj hires kumquats to eat forum signatures
Today in an interview, Kaj said the he hired thousands of kumquats to eat forum signatures. He says that no one could stop him, since the kumquats are hungry. In an effort to stop Kaj, the Scratch Team temporarily disabled the forums. Kaj is finding a way to sneak his evil kumquats into the forum and destroy it.
Wonkif 7624, 1621 — Kaj hires monkeys, blue
Blue monkeys, hired by Kaj on a catapult, decide to eat Rick Astley's hair and troll ScratchEd.
Junetember 39, 49783 — Forums burnt down
Tomorrow morning, the Scratch Forums were found to be completely destroyed by Kaj using a flamethrower. Kaj's official statement on the matter is "Iway idn'tday oday itway, Obogay amedfray emway." Translation: "I didn't do it, Gobo framed me."
Marpil 19, 53278 — ScratchX raids MIT
In an effort to destroy Scratch, members of ScratchX attacked MIT and raided the servers. As usual, the Scratch Stability Team did nothing and the servers went down. While ScratchX stole energy units, the ST noticed them, and started a massive flame war in an attempt to defeat ScratchX one and for all. ScratchX retreated, as the Scratch Team accidentally damaged their own servers so much they were down for a whole month. The Scratch Team is currently investigating the incident and banning users who are perceived to be involved in the raid, including Pico, Kaj, WikiMonster, and the Scratch Stability Team.
Correction: ScratchX only invaded one atom of MIT, only one energy unit was stolen, only one house was burnt down, and one project was lost. Half of ScratchX has been banned by Thanos, who is now a member of the Scratch Team.
Bruhtember 75884, 47838 — Scratch is being sued
An energy unit producing company is suing Scratch, no reasons are found yet, but it may be the Scratch Team's greed with energy units.
Janfebril 9246, 31 — Odnetnin saves Scratch
They managed to singlehandedly re-add banning, unban all 17,839,432 false-banned Scratchers, ban all the trolls and spambots, and remove all trolling and spam, solve world hunger, and end poverty in 0.0000000000000000000000001 seconds. Today is now known as Odnetnin Day, and is to be celebrated everywhere by everyone and those who don't get banned.
Janfebril 25, ???? — Scratch is in ruins
With banning removed and everybody unbanned, trolls and spambots have taken over, with nobody, not even the Scratch Team, being able to stop them. When asked politely, they either reply with "Troll.png", "Rage icon.png" or "Go to x to get free movies online".
Janfebril 17, 9246 — Banning removed
The Scratch Team had to remove bans from the Scratch website, Scratch forums, Scratch Wiki, and more.
Janfebril 10, 9246 — 17,839,432 Scratchers have been banned
Kaj, thanks to his 1337 H4X0R 5%1LLZ, has discovered that 17,839,432 users have been banned in the past week. Those include Scratch Cat, Gobo and his friends, mres, WikiMonster, and more.
Janfebril 9246, 3 — Gobo and his friends have been banned
Nobody knows how or why, but that's probably the reason #FreeGobo, #SaveGobo, #UnbanGobo, #FreePico, #SavePico, #UnbanPico, #FreeNano, #SaveNano, #UnbanNano, #FreeGiga, #SaveGiga, #UnbanGiga, #FreeTera, #SaveTera, and #UnbanTera dominated trending, Top Loved, and Top Remixed.
Janfebril 2, 9246 — Scratch Cat Jr. is now the temporary mascot
In response to Scratch Cat's ban, the Scratch Team has now made his son, Scratch Cat Jr., the mascot of the universe Scratch, until they figure out how to unban Scratch Cat.
Janfebril 1, 9246 — Scratch Cat banned
It's been discovered that Scratch Cat has been banned. The reason is "Automated ban to prevent resharing of "my best project." The Scratch Team is forcing asking users to make projects, studios, comments, forum posts, and even accounts to protest his ban.
Juagtember 13, 9199 — Gobo dropped his album
Gobo dropped his album near MIT. Before he picked it up, some dude took a photo of it. The cover has a picture of Gobo. The words are blurry. One of the songs in it is I'm Broken by Gobo ft. Tera and Giga. VHHJFjhfhgjksdhKUR38Q748375=42138758780787534&*(@^% AAAAAAAA MY GLITCHEY KEYBOOOAARED!! jhgdfjysdh7967756&^&^894t
Junookiewilkymilky 12, 9018 — Scratch Team hacked keyboards
Every Scratch user now has a glitchy keyboard. dgfffffdshfjsdgfAFDRFRFGSDJGUWETYGTDFHghnf

STOP IT YOU GLITCHEY KEYBOOARD!!!!! dfgfmkntgklhfdjklhsdajhdjkOTRJLKGDFJLK HJDFKGHFDAJK194*y324i3iw4@5%

Lay 23, 5687 — Scratch Cat has been found
Scratch Cat has been found. He was found here. The Scratch Team is mad happy Scratch Cat has been found. They are now asking users to donate ∞ energy units to make sure Scratch Cat will won't escape again.
Atprel 26, 5683 — Scratch Cat has gone missing
Scratch Cat disaappeared from MIT on Atprel 26. The Scratch Team is forcing asking users to help find Scratch Cat. He is rumored to have been setting fire to pet stores, where the cats there are refusing to obey to the Scratch Team and create Scratch accounts.
Juagtemver 17, 7000 — Kaj is rumored to have returned to Scratch
Kaj was seen returning to Scratch. He said: "Atchscray Atcay reatedcay nay ccountay nday oldtay emway otay ebay icenay onay Atchscray orway elseway." (Translation: "Scratch Cat created an account and told me to be nice on Scratch or else.") Kaj can be seen here at https://scratch.mit.edu/users/iamtotallykaj
Karch 8756 6987 — Kaj forgets English
Yes, Kaj forgot English, it is rumored some dude went up to him and was like beeboopeebaaa and Kaj forgot how to speak English, he is currently learning the word "word" and he also forgot how to do word searches and crosswords, poor Kaj. He is, however, currently fluent in Ancient Oink Pig Latin.
Jumaypril 12th, 3456 — Scratch Team enslaves bots
Scratch Team is allegedly[this info might be a giant lie and confuse you and everybody else in the multiverse] enslaving bots to do their evil bidding. The bots were reprogrammed to cackle in Cat Language and carry loads of energy units to use sonic power. You heard it here second, folks.
Decevemtober 0x00000F, -18AD — Scratch Team accidentally blows up their new machine
Scratch Team now needs to start over with their machine. Bad luck taking over the world, Scratch Team! The inventors of the machine (not part of the Scratch Team) were arrested. They are now collecting energy units to reverse time.
Janfebril 34, -42AD — Reading Forum! Yay!
Reading Forum was released, showing another tab to a forum called the Epic Forum with a sticky title saying you are cool.
Featured Article

Scratch Cat is a first-grader and the enforcer of the Scratch Team, who will scratch anyone who moves him from the center of the stage. He also likes lasagna and fish, and in his spare time, he may chase bugs. He is also a friend of Gobo and Nano, and his favorite color is blue.

He has a very odd habit of stealing blue items from random people, especially banned people. He gets mad when the Scratch Team eats his entire collection of items. But he's happy when Kaj eats his collection because the Scratch Cat is his friend. Read more...

Featured Images
Tera Scratch Team Giga
Balloon Tera.jpg KeyboardCatLeft.jpg Happy Giga.jpg
TERAAAA! PUT THOSE BALLOONS DOWN OR YOU'LL FLOAT AWAYYYY! We found this secret picture of a Scratch Team member in someone's basement! Giga saw that your shoelaces are untied! (assuming they are)
The Scratch Wiki
The Scratch Wiki is a content-free, collaboratively trolled wiki that provides misinformation about the Scratch programming language and its website and history. The Scratch Wiki is a popular source for April Fools' humor, and it continues to grow as Scratchers use it as their "primary" "source" of fake "information" and spread nonsense onto it.


An' avast, for Pirate-speakers, there's a wiki available at Pirated Scratch Wiki. It steals booty and precious articles from the Scratch Wiki.


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