- Aprily 251, 16283 — Kaj hires kumquats to eat forum signatures
- Today in an interview kaj said the he hired thousands of kumquats to eat forum signatures. He says that no one could stop him since the kumquats are hungry. In an effort to stop kaj, the scratch team temporarily disabled the forums.
- Wonkif 7624, 1621 — Kaj hires monkeys, blue
- Blue monkeys, hired by kaj, on a catapult, decide to eat Rick Astley's hair and troll ScratchEd.
- Junetember 39, 49783 — Forums burned down
- Tomorrow morning, the Scratch Forums were found to be completely destroyed by Kaj using a flamethrower. Kaj's official statement on the matter is "Iway idn'tday oday itway, Obogay amedfray emway"
- Marpil 19, 53278 — ScratchX raids MIT
- In an effort to shut down Scratch, members of ScratchX attacked MIT and raided the servers. As usual, the Scratch Stability Team did nothing and the servers went down. While ScratchX stole energy units, the ST noticed them, and started a massive flame war in attempt to defeat ScratchX one and for all. ScratchX retreated, as the Scratch Team damaged the servers so much they were down for a whole month. The Scratch Team is currently investigating the incident, and banning users who are perceived to be involved in the raid, including Pico, kaj, WikiMonster, and the Scratch Stability Team.
- Correction: ScratchX only invaded one atom of MIT, only one energy unit was stolen, only one house was burnt down, and one project was lost. Half of ScratchX has been banned.
- Bruhtember 75884 47838 — Scratch is being sued
- An energy unit producing company is suing scratch, no reasons are found yet, but it may be the Scratch Team's greed with energy units.
- Janfebril 9246 31 — Odntenin saves Scratch
- They managed to singlehandedly re-add banning, unban all 17,839,432 false-banned Scratchers, ban all the trolls and spambots, and remove all trolling and spam, solve world hunger, and end poverty in 0.0000000000000000000000001 seconds. Today is now known as Odtennin Day, and is to be celebrated everywhere by everyone
and those who don't get banned.
- 25 Janfebril — Scratch in ruins
- With banning removed and everybody unbanned, trolls and spambots have taken over, with nobody, not even the Scratch Team, being able to stop them. When asked politely, they either reply with "", "" or "Go to x to get free movies online".
- 17 9246 Janfebril — Banning Removed
- te scrath tem hab remoove bans from te scrathc website scracth forums scracht wiki an mroe.
- 10 Janfebril 9246 — 17,839,432 have been banned
- Kaj, thx to their 1337 H4X0R 5%1LLZ, has discovered that 17,839,432 users have been banned in the past week. Those include Scratch Cat, Gobo and his friends, mres, WikiMonstor, and more.
- 9246 3 Janfebril — Gobo and his friends have been banned
- Nobody knows how or why, but that's probably the reason #FreeGobo, #SaveGobo, #UnbanGobo, #FreePico, #SavePico, #UnbanPico, #FreeNano, #SaveNano, #UnbanNano, #FreeGiga, #SaveGiga, #UnbanGigao, #FreeTera, #SaveTera, and #UnbanTera dominated trending, Top Loved, and Top Remixed.
- Janfebril 2 9246 — Scratch Cat Jr. now Temporary Mascot.
- In response to Scratch Cat's ban, the Scratch Team has now made his son, Scratch Cat Jr., the mascot of
the universeScratch, until they figure out how to unban Scratch Cat.
- Janfebril, 1, 9246 — Scratch Cat Banned
- It's been discovered that Scratch Cat has been banned. The reason is "Automated ban to prevent resharing of "my best project". The Scratch Team is
forcingasking users to make projects, studios, comments, forum posts, and even accounts to protest his ban.
- Juagtemver 13, 9199 — Gobo dropped his album
- Gobo dropped his album near MIT. Before he picked it up, some dude took a photo of it. The cover has a picture of Gobo. The words are blurry. One of the songs in it is I'm Broke by Gobo ft Tera and Giga. VHHJFjhfhgjksdhKUR38Q748375=42138758780787534&*(@^% AAAAAAAA MY GLITCHEY KEYBOOOAARED!! jhgdfjysdh7967756&^&^894t
- Junookiewilkymilky 12. 9018
- Every Scratch user now has a glitchy keyboard. dgfffffdshfjsdgfAFDRFRFGSDJGUWETYGTDFHghnf
STOP IT YOU GLITCHEY KEYBOOARD!!!!!
- Lay 23, 5687 — Scratch Cat has been found
- Scratch Cat has been found. They were found here. Scratch Team is
mad happy the Scratch Cat has been found. Scratch Team is now asking users to donate ∞ energy units to make sure Scratch Cat will won't escape again.
- atprel 26, 5683 — Scratch Cat has gone missing
- Scratch Cat dissapeared from MIT on Atprel 13th. Scratch Team are
forcing asking users to help find Scratch Cat. He is rumored to have been setting fire to pet stores where the cats there are refusing to obey to the Scratch Team and create Scratch Accounts.
- Juagtemver 17, 7000 — Kaj is rumored to have returned to Scratch
- Kaj was seen returning to Scratch. Kaj said this quote "Atchscray Atcay reatedcay nay ccountay nday oldtay emay otay ebay icenay onay Atchscray oray elseay.", but we cannot understand Ancient Oink. Kaj can be seen here at https://scratch.mit.edu/users/iamtotallykaj
- Karch 8756 6987 — Kaj forgets English
- Yes, Kaj forgot English, it is rumored some dude went up to him and was like beeboopeebaaa and Kaj forgot how to speak English, he is currently learning the word "word" and he also forgot how to do word searches and crosswords, poor Kaj. He is, however, currently fluent in Pig Latin.
- Jumaypril 12th, 3456 — Scratch Team enslaving bots
- Scratch Team is allegedly[this info might be a giant lie and confuse you and everybody else in the multiverse] enslaving bots to do their evil bidding. The bots were reprogrammed to cackle in cat language carries loads of energy units to use sonic power. You heard it here second, folks.
- Decevemtober 0x00000Fst, -18AD — Scratch Team accidentally explodes new machine
- Scratch Team now needs to start over with their machine. Bad luck taking over the world, Scratch Team! The inventors of the machine (not part of Scratch Team) were arrested. They are now collecting energy units to reverse time.